"Babe! It’s me, Marty! Have I got a deal for you!
No, no, nothing like that...it’s a book deal. Yeah, a real book. It’s loaded with stuff that you can’t live without!
Like what? Let me tell ya babe, this is the real deal. It’s got tons of rules. The stuff that you need to make your game the best it can be. Like new rules for Fame that lets you become a legend of The Games, and even spend Fame points to get you some special perks. It’s also loaded with guides for sponsorship and endorsements, as well as dealing with the life of the celebrity–which can be a real bear. But I don’t have to tell you about that, huh? It even has those hanger-on types like paparazzi, fans, and even groupies written up. Oh, and don’t forget all the info on managers and agents.
Yeah, yeah, it has all those things that you come to expect from a book like this, like new feats, new items and equipment–including some really clever magic items–and even those prestige classes. But let’s get right to the heart of the matter, okay?
Xcrawl is a sport, right? And what’s a sport without statistics? That’s right! So, this is the book that tells you how to keep stats in a crawl, so that you know how good you are against left-handed wizards on a Tuesday.
Oh, and by the executive decree of Emperor Ronald himself, this book has the complete rules for Xcrawl, all the way from the little kids in Action League to the dead-man-walking running through Unlimited Class.
And one more thing: you know what they say, right? If you die, you die. And this is the book that explains it in detail!
So, you in? Yeah...I thought you would be...”